I love building stuffs. Whether it’s a website, an app or something tangible, there is some pride I attach seeing the thing come to life and flourish. Also, I’ve been subscribing to what’s called “Deep Work” by Cal Newport. Where you spend as much time on your work, uninterrupted and optimized for deep (and slow) productivity.
When I do it right, I also derive an immense sense of pride for myself and my work that I overcame difficult problems and as they say “slain the dragon.” Slaying the dragon means overcoming this problem that is in front of you and preventing you from progressing towards your goals. They are not hindrances but can be thought of more as tests. They build your character your skillset and your knowledge of the world.
However, there is one thing that enables all of this. And that is family. Although I love working, my family is the source of my joy, happiness and contentment. It is what keeps me grounded.
I have had times in my life when I have a chaotic dysfunctional family life and doing work was a lot harder. My focus was wrecked, my health, both physical and mental, deteriorated and working hard seems rather pointless.
I would even argue that a stable family life is crucial to the life of productive individuals.
And in addition to the stability a good family life offers, at the end of the day, family is truly the only thing that matters.
Which is funny. Because in a day we would spend 8 hours at our work, yet spend less (sometimes waaay less) than that with our loved ones. However, despite the reverse ratio, the true wealth of life is the joy with family and the ability to be a strong support for them.
Not all of us are lucky to have a good stable family. My original one was dysfunctional. And I had no choice but to leave it behind. Just like we have to walk away from toxic people, I walked away from the only family I know. Fortunately, I met others. Those that I am not related by blood to, but are good quality people that lifts me up instead of puts me down.
Filipinos are a collective culture. We are not individualistic and we prefer to be in the company of family. It is a large part of our identity. So, whether you find yourself one of the lucky ones to have a loving supportive family or a “chosen” family, my wish is you have a strong supportive base that is there for you and that you can be for them. One of my great joys is repaying back the love and support given to me once I am able to stand on my own. There are few things more satisfying in this world than that.